Man barely avoids eating gross Christmas cookies
CHICAGO, IL. (Pistachio Times) Andrew Stevens of Ravenswood just narrowly avoided eating his aunt’s awful Christmas Cookies. The platter included…
Year: 2024
DOGE: solving government inefficiency one more department at a time
Trump recently announced the creation of the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) headed by Elon Musk and Vivek Ramaswamy. The…
A quick autopsy on the failures of the Democratic party
The 2024 Presidential Election was an absolute disaster for the United States, and the Democrats should not be absolved from…
Sweet corn festival serves circus fun by the cob
Thousands of individuals, spanning from young to old, roamed the streets of Uptown Normal a few months ago, each carrying…
Trying every Avanti’s menu item: Part 0
When in Bloomington-Normal…eat some Avanti’s! Avanti’s is a pizza place in Bloomington-Normal which has been around for over 50 years.…
Ranking AP classes I took
AP classes were some of the best I took during high school, but not all are created equal. Below I’ll…
I was wrong about ChatGPT
I do not consent to my work or likeness being used to train large language models or generative AI. There,…
We shouldn’t be ashamed of deep dish
Deep dish is not just a thing for tourists, and it frustrates me to no end when some Chicagoans consistently…
Local man finally satisfied after turning house into a temperate deciduous forest
COLUMBUS, OH. (Pistachio Times) – A local man has been finally emotionally satisfied after years of building up his collection…
Stock Market crashes after revealing battle with suicidal ideation
NEW YORK (Pistachio Times) – The Stock Market recently announced its ongoing battle with suicidal ideation, causing a major loss…